"with no distinction between contemplator and contemplated." Thich Nhat Hanh
Are you there? It is four in the morning. The wind's rolling through the windows. I am here.
How calm it can be in our bodies when we are busy. How at ease. Then the quiet comes and a pressure builds beneath the skin. And the end could be near. Near as here.
A song plays. I wish it was longer. I want to write the words as they sound being sung. But tonight's no time for quoting. The words I spoke yesterday spin in my head and I feel them as a presence. As solid things feel, as they are felt.
However long I have missed you, I am not missing you this morning. When I walked a mile in the early dawn, nor when I paused to think. It wasn't you I missed. But a dream I had. A dream where I was dancing. With a man I barely knew. Then. And now. To know someone at all is for them to desire knowing you.
I was going to see a play this weekend. But the rain has cancelled everything. The rain has brought me closer. Just when I thought I had forgot.